wow, what a shock, indeed...

This definitely merits a full-scale examination:

The lack of offers to Barry Bonds will be examined by the baseball players' association as part of its annual review of the free-agent market. Less than two weeks before opening day, the 43-year-old home run king remains unsigned.

They should hire me to do this review. I'd print out the rest of this article and submit it along with my invoice:

Bonds was indicted in November on four counts of perjury and one count of obstruction of justice, charges stemming from 2003 grand jury testimony in which he denied knowingly using illegal performance-enhancing drugs. The seven-time NL MVP pleaded not guilty.

I'd feel justified in submitting the bill based on just this, because, you know, there just might be a tiny connection between a criminal indictment and the lack of interest among teams.