Dear tight-assed Northern woman:

Unlike wherever you came from originally, New Orleanians are, by and large, a friendly lot. We tell people good morning when we pass by on the sidewalk. People are more likely to wave at someone in a car when at a red light. We're more likely to chat each other up in line at the coffee shop in the morning.

Get used to it.

As much as sometimes the rest of the Baptist South doesn't like to claim New Orleans, we're still part of the south. Not only is the city steeped in Southern Culture, we pretty much created a goodly portion of said culture. That means you should expect to hear yourself referred to in a number of different manners depending on the social or business situation.

Get used to it.

For openers, we tend to go a step beyond friendly; we're polite. You'll hear a lot of "yes, ma'am" and "no, ma'am" when working with folks. In business settings, that politeness takes on a more formal tone. You may find yourself referred to as "Ms. So-and-so" by people when you're introduced. Even after someone's been working with you for a few hours or days, they may still put that "Ms." in front of your first name. (The increase in our hispanic population in the city has compunded this particular reference, since a lot of Mexicans and Central Americans would use "senor" or "senora" in conversation in Spanish. They automatically use the honorific in English as well.)

Get used to it.

When you get into a retail setting, the rules change a bit. A lot of people who work in bakeries, po-boy places, grocery stores, and restaurants don't feel the need to be as formal. They've got a "mi casa es su casa" attitude about their place of business, and it shows.

Get used to it.

New Orleanians love endearments. Whether it's darlin' (usually pronounced "dawlin"), heart, boo, honey, hun, or sweetie for a woman, or cap, sport, buddy, or big guy for a man, people who work in retail want to be friendly. They want you to feel like you're family. If they knew your name, they'd start with "Hi, Ms. Jane," but even then, they'll lapse back to heart or darlin'. If they don't know your first name, they don't want you to feel left out, so you'll be boo from the get-go.

Get used to it.

Women and men both use these endearments. They transcend age--you might see a thirty-something woman call a sixty-something female customer "sweetie," and the older lady isn't going to take offense. Same goes for men. These guys aren't lounge lizards who are trying to hit on women in a bar; it's not sexual harassment.

Get used to it.

How we behave towards each other is part of the social contract we all buy into when we move into a community. There's a codocil in that contract in this community that says these sorts of endearments are not to be considered offensive, nor do they create a hostile workplace. If you don't want to be addressed as "honey" or "boo," I'm sure you can get your coffee at a national chain like Starbucks, where their standards are defined more by people that come from places like you do rather than New Orleanians. If you prefer eating our food and drinking our coffee, however, you have to accept our social contract.

Get used to it.

Or don't, we really don't care. Well, actually we do care. We hate to think we've been rude to folks.

Love,
YatPundit